Really, you want to know how to make that dreadful store experience fun with 5 kids? I think I know the answers.
I’ve been known to be wrong. Once. Okay, maybe twice.
Go ahead and read on but at your own risk!
How To Make Grocery Shopping FUN (with kids)!
- Make a list as long as can – make sure it is done alphabetically. (Alphabetically is how the aisles are arranged.)
- Fast two days before going to the store. This makes everything look delicious especially canned squid or pickled pig’s feet.
- Let your kids scream at the top of their lungs (for 7 seconds) every time they see an employee from the grocery store.
- Pretend the meat section is the fastest Nascar track in the league. Let your kids take off their shoes and run in their socks. If they give a high five to a man wearing a baseball cap – it is an extra 100 points. Kid who wins – gets to stand up on the seat part of the shopping cart.
- In the candy aisle – encourage the kids to open all the candy packets and sample each one.
- Make sure the kids get toys from the toy aisle and spread them ALL over the store. Not one aisle is to be missing a toy!
- Place 10 candles in a circle in the ice cream aisle – light them as you all sing “Kum Ba Yah” – it is always too cold there.
- In the bread aisle – let the kids poke holes in every package with their pinkie finger.
- Do the “Twist” down the Pet food aisle! Don’t forget to squeeze ALL the dog toys! In fact, just keep squeezing them until you get to the register and tell the employee (after your kids quit screaming) – you really don’t need them and they don’t really work like they should.
- Mommy gets to yell “WHOOP” every time she sees someone frown at her children.
- Make a limbo rod at the exit of the store. No one gets out until they do the LIMBO!
- The most important of them all – Don’t forget to go at naptime!
I’m not responsible if the manager of the grocery store gives you dirty looks or other patrons make disgusting phrases under there breath! I’m just not responsible for any of your actions or your kids.
In fact, you didn’t hear any of this from me.
How do you make
grocery shopping fun?
grocery shopping fun?
I send Dad.
This was written, in part, by my kids who told me how they wouldn’t act in the store! Although, I made up the “whoop” part. (Wink!)
Blessings to you! You are loved!
This Works for Me, sort of.
That is hilarious! 🙂 I love your blog and am now going to be following it! 🙂 Erin
http://www.healthybranscoms.com
Thanks for making me laugh.
We definitely packed snacks. In little baggies, so as not to give off the vibe that we’s stealin’.
1. Fill your pockets with the FREE TWIST TIES in the bakery and produce sections. (Bonus, leave them in your pocket when it’s time for your clothes to be washed, later that day.)
2. Reach over and pick off the M&Ms and sprinkles on the tops of the doughnuts that are sittin’ pretty at kids’ eye level on the bakery shelf. Then, innocently ask for the “Free Kids Club Cookies” as if you haven’t tasted anything sweet in a while.
3. If you’re thirsty, there is FREE ICE to chew by the handfuls! Find it next to the prepared fruits in the produce section or lining the tray of the fresh pork cuts (of course!) in the meat dept. (Tip: If your store doesn’t use crushed ice, you can always use your fingernails to dig off the ice made produced by the condensation along the walls of the freezer cases.)
He-hee!
My darling daughter, you make me so proud! Fond memories of you in the store… need I share any real stories? I just know that my grand children would not participate or contribute any of these ideas, had to be their mom. Love ya!
Mom
I promise if I ever meet you in the store (which, of course, is unlikely as we’re here in Scotland, and you’re…. there!), I will high-five all your kids, dance a jig, and then race you all to the door before we’re caught!
This post was hilarious and totally made my day :).